May 2009

What do you do when you lose many seats in elections that you expected to win? You do some rethink and evalaute your poll strategies,right? Wrong,….., wrong,that is if you are a Mayawati.

If you are the Behenji of the Dalits, their only source of hope and succor, then you go on a virtual rampage…….after all protection of the rights of the downtrodden is no small matter.

In the first few hours after the less than happy poll result you sulk and blame the Muslims first.Even though you do couch your words in a little bit of nicety by saying,’hamare Muslim bhaiyon ne haamara saath nahin diya’ but you still sound as if you would love nothing better than to wring the collective Muslim neck.

Then you in one sweep transfer/move/fire the PSU heads, who were your party cronies and had been awarded these posts as political rewards………(Mughal khatam ho gaye,angrez chaley gaye but hamari baksheesh aur jagirdaari ki riwayat abhi kayam hai.)

Then next you scowl on TV and try and put on a brave face (even if it comes across as more angry than brave) and read out numbers to show how actually your vote share has increased even if you did not win too many seats. You try and not talk about the ‘discovering India Rahul Baba’ because as it turned out he seems to have actually been rewarded by U.P folks for his efforts to reconnect with them.Guess the Dalits in whose homes he ate/slept found more empathy in him than in your pink silks and blings that were supposed to light the aspirational fire in them.

As the days pass by and the UPA in Delhi does not really do an excited somersault at your offer of ‘unconditional’ support you look inwards again and find newer people to blame.This time you pick upon IAS officers(District Magistrates and a Comissioner too) to blame.You transfer 13 of them at one go, mostly from constituencies where your party lost seats. What else is this intelligent, creamy layer of the babudom for if not to campaign for you,arm twist locals (voters and donors) on your behalf and ensure your victory…..?

Does all this upset me? Not at all. I am actually looking forward to Maya Madam digging a bit more of a garve for the ultimate demise of BSP in the next assembly elections. I no longer live in dread of having her as our blingy,shiny Prime Minister. I do not have to cringe at her parochial and almost inane commentary on foreign affairs (that is when she talks of anything other than her famous engineering skills). The Brahmins are already drifting away towards the Congress and the BJP, the Muslims are also looking at other options, the people she is axeing indiscriminately are going to be another future resentment pool and the Dalits too will ultimately see through her statue building ways…..

Yes, her rise to power was dramatic and yes she could have been a constructive role model for the less empowered. But that could only have happened had she chosen to do something other than award posts and threaten and transfer those who did not seem to be working 100% to ensure her win.

Yes, she could have given India her Obamaesque moment but it was not to be….she rode to power on the vote of the dispossessed and then herself became possessed of the ‘junoon’ to amass wealth, property, jewellery, build memorial parks with aethetically disturbing statues…….she could have been( and may still be if she changes her game plan) the Dalit Queen  and the first Dalit PM but right now she is looking more like a tantrumy matron than a mature politician.

P.S: I fear that next the Madam might wreak vengeance on the hapless Dalits who let Rahul Baba eat and sleep under their roofs.Its all their fault for supping with the Delhi bloke who is still discovering India at the age of 39. After all she is the one who is supposed to do social engineering by getting the Brahmins and the Dalits to meet in common forums (where they still eat seperately, I am told). How dare these mere Dalits (her vote banks) do engineering on their own. Hrrmpf ,Grrrr


I knew it was too good to be true………..all this media drivel about a huge mandate and  ‘neeli pagdi waale ‘sardar ji having a free hand now in building his government and enforcing his policies………… The Left was junked, no doubt, but in our land we do not have a shortage of those who can play the spoiler.

What has happened after the polls makes the pre-poll dramatics of various UPA and NDA allies look like child’s play……

Those who celebrated DMK’s substantial win in TN can now sit and watch the cunning master at work. His wish list of how many cabinet/ministerial berths he wants for DMK is a virtual roll call of his entire(squabbling) family and clan

He wants a tainted guy like A.Raja and a non-performer T.R.Baalu in. the cabinet…..Baalu’s (non) performance on infrastructure issues last time, he was given that ministry, is legendary and MMS is insisting on having clean and capable people inducted into key ministries…….The Muthuvel Karunanidhi clan falls short on both counts. 

But never mind…….corruption and criminal charges have never been an impediment to a political career in the land of the Ganga and the Cauvery……….and what is wrong with Karuna (sunglasses and all) insisting that all key (read money making) portfolios be given to members of his extended family and friends? He is just being a responsible ‘Karta’ of a undivided (hee hee) Hindu family….he is the patriarch and if he wants one crony to have the chance of getting paid huge sums of money, by telecom bizkings for grant of desired licenses, then he is just fulfilling his responsibilties and duties as a patriarch.The ‘karta’ (as defined in Hindu Law) is supposed to look out after the financial safety and prosperity of the family,na.

And what is wrong in Baalu getting another chance at making money off infrastructural contracts? Last time around ,maybe ( he was inexperienced,na), he asked for too high a cut and the contractors baulked and the national highway development came to a halt.He has learnt from his mistakes and will ask for (I am guessing) reasonable amounts and thus our country will get connected by a highway grid at a super fast speed.Fair deal, na? 

Then there is the other issue of a cabinet berth for his son Azhagiri, daughter Kanimozhi, nephew Dayanidhi Maran……what is wrong with Daddy dearest wanting all kids on same level of privilege? There will be less fights if they all have their own ministries to milk, na?

My sources tell me that Sonia ji is keen to indulge Muthuvelu Karuna but sardar ji and some close to him are not budging….I wonder why……..

Or maybe Karuna’s role as ‘karta’ of the Hindu undivided family is not cutting mustard with sardar ji because he figured out that Karuna is not a Hindu in the first place…….. The prime ministerial snoops went to work and dug up these facts:

1) Karuna is a self-proclaimed athiest
2) He can not be a Hindu because he insulted Lord Ram in most derisive and derogatory terms over the Ram-sethu project.
3) He has married three times and we all know that Hindu men are not allowed to marry more than once unless they divorce the first wife……….two of these wives can be seen sitting dutifully on either end of his bed when he went on that world’s shortest fast (between breakfast and lunch)

karuna fasting

Armed with this proof MMS has not (yet) caved in to all of Karuna’s demands. A miffed Karuna was last seen being wheeled out at breakneck speed in a rickety wheelchair from the New Delhi portals of power towards the Delhi airport. (He keeps his motorised spiffy wheelchair and hydarulic van for use on Chennai’s ‘ultra smooth’ roads).

Keep a watch on this space for more political shenangians……….I heard that Farooq Abdullah has also made a fast journey towards the Delhi airport. He has the more pressing issue of watching the remianing IPL matches in South Africa,na.

The majesty and grandeur of India’s timeless festivals has to be seen to be believed.I got these pictures in an email and I just have to share these with everyone. With gratitude and thanks to the site responsible for these pictures. I hope to be there amongst the crowds one day.

The majestic elephants

The majestic elephants

The traditional drummers

The traditional drummers

The faithful gather

The faithful gather

The temple elephants come out to a rapturous welcome

The temple elephants come out to a rapturous welcome

The tourist join the faithful for a unique experience

The tourist join the faithful for a unique experience

The elephants in all their finery surrounded by the crowds

The elephants in all their finery surrounded by the crowds


The much awaited results of the mammoth Indian elections are coming in as I write this and, regardless of what the final tally is, the writing is on the wall for BJP. The Lotus has wilted and it will take a very long time for it to revive (if ever).

Congress supportes celebrate lead
Congress supporters celebrate

The wily and wise Indian voter has not only snubbed BJP’s brand of politics but also realised that not voting for BJP was not enough….voting the other big national party (Congress) in with a good margin was essential for the nation to move forward.

So why did the Lotus wilt? First and foremost, I think people have  not really rejected its pro-Hindu stand but its anti-‘others’ plank. The grievances of the majority community may be many and valid but it seems the voter has brought to a halt any attempt to address those by victimising the minorities. The sooner the BJP understands that pro-Hindu should not automatically translate into anti-minorities, the better it will be for its survival and recovery.

Second,the BJP went into this election bereft of any charismatic leader with a national appeal and with no real election plank.They periodically brought out the tired  ‘mandir’ issue but it failed to fire anyone imagination. The religion of the majority comunity is too plural, too varied across regions and all attempts to make Ayodhya into the Hindu ‘Mecca’ had died a natural death a long time ago.Then again Ram though venerated in all parts of the country in various ways, can not be made into Hinduism’s answer to Allah or God of the monotheistic religions.We are what we are and the Punjabi is as happy to trek to Vaishnodevi shrine for his pilgrimage, the south Indian to Madurai,Rameshawarm or Sabrimalai,the Gujarati to Somnath temple as the Maharashtrian is to go to his Siddhivinayak temple. Ofcourse we cross visit all these sacred places but I do not think an average Hindu feels the need to have a centralised ‘Vatican’ for our religion.

So, minus the temple issue the BJP’s rath screeched to a halt. Which way the BJP goes now will be crucial for Indian politics and its people going ahead.The media at the moment is predicting that BJP will go more communal and more strident in its Hindutva stand in order to stir up the communal pot and try and polarise the population along religious lines.

I HOPE NOT.India needs a national party that can be a credible alternative to the Congress but BJP can never be that unless it brings itself in slowly towards the centre from its extreme right stand.Its think tank that has ‘tanked’so badly in its startegies this time around needs to do some hard thinking and realise that no matter what the drawing room and corner shop conversations maybe,when it comes to choosing a government the people are wary of voting in anyone who can potentialy de-stabilise the country, increase its communal rifts and threaten its economic development.

Its not for nothing that the Hindu is stereotyped as THE BANIA ….. our economic viabilty and prosperity are our   Holy Cows and we will do all to preserve it.So, if BJP wants to ever emerge from the ICU, that  this election has sent them to, it must realise the power of the inclusive development mantra.That is what Congress was able to project.

The biggest gift the electorate has given to the country, and ultimately to itself, is that they have given enough numbers to the UPA so that it does not have to seek the support of the Left parties.Minus such debilitating partners the ‘Singh who will be King’ again can go ahead with his economic policies and hopefully provide more inclusive development to all of India’s citizens.


1)Karunaanidhi “Fasting” !!


karuna fasting
karuna fasting

First time in world history fasting of only 4 hours and that too with an AC,…….
Fasting starts after breakfast and ends before lunch.   ! ! ! ! !( Those two beauties on either end of his bed are his two ‘devoted’ wives…..and I thought polygamy was illegal in India for Hindus)

2) Strange Bedfellows
The man who was the Chief Minister of U.P at the time the Babri Masjid was demolished by a mob of  “Ram Sevaks’ is now the NBF (new best friend) of the self -appointed friend and champion of U.P muslims !!! This election ( like those before) has been full of unbelievable claims and counter claims, marriages of convenience and pure deals of mutual advantage to the politicos (and of utter disadvantage to the country and the electorate) but even in this atmosphere, Mulayam’s claim of Kalyan helping him to woo the Muslim voters is hard to digest. How the wily Indian voter will vote will be known on the 16th but until then we will have to swallow Mulayam’s line that yesterday’s communalist is today’s selfless secularist………I wonder what is happening to yesterday’s secularist……..LOL
3) Maa ka ladla
This maa ka laadla, Pappu Yadav, has been barred from contesting elections because he has murder charges against him…..but no worries.Bharat mein to ‘phamily’ hi sab kuch hoti hai na……so his ‘mommy dearest’ is contesting instead…….seat maa ki hogi but peeche power Pappu Bhaiyya ki…………woh pehle Laloo yadav also did the same na……….seat mein Rabri Devi and seat ke peeche Laloo Bhai…….so iska precedent hai.
If this is not bizarre enough then take this……..according to the papers filed for the elections,Pappu’s mommy is only 7 years older to him……ROFL………These are the ‘netas’of Hindustan who are setting examples of everything, from lying,falsifying,corruption,cheating to using family members as front for carrying on their netagiri.
Yeh neeche picture mummy ji ki hai.
AGE NO BAR: Shanti Priya, an Independent contesting from the Purnea parliamentary seat, is just 49 years old……just seven years older than the son,Pappu.

AGE NO BAR: Shanti Priya, an  Independent contesting from the Purnea parliamentary seat, is just 49 years old.

Mummy ho to aisi.

Indian elections are usually a time for worrying….we worry about the possible violence,the further increase in rifts along regional,religious and caste lines and we worry about the paucity of credible candidates and viable ideolgies to vote for.

But this mammoth exercise of electoral rights also brings out its own brand of humor and I share something that came to me in an email.


Subject:  Political  Parties and their Symbols

Q: Why is the  Samajwadi  Party’s symbol ‘Cycle’?
A: Because after a ban on  English and use of computers, that’s all we’ll be able to  afford
Q: Why is the Congress  party’s symbol ‘Hand’?
A: To remind Indians that our  fate is forever in the hand of one family
Q: Why  is  BJP Symbol ‘Lotus’?
A: Lotus is the symbol of Sarawasti  and learning. BJP will educate us through the wisdom of Varun Gandhi and  Pravin Togadia.
Q: Why is Mayawati’s  symbol ‘Elephant’?
A: It’s a self portrait.
Q: Why  is  Jayalalitha’s symbol ‘Two leaves’?
A: Because that’s  what remained after Amma ate up all the fruit
Q: Why  is  DMK’s symbol ‘Sun’?
A: So that Karunanidhi can justify  wearing shades indoors
Q: Why is Lalu’s symbol  ‘Laltain’?
A: Because there’s no electricity in Bihar
Q:  Why is CPM’s symbol  ‘Hammer and Sickle’?
A: Because that’s what you will be using if they  come to power
Q: Why is Sharad Pawar’s  symbol ‘Clock’?
A: Because his time never seems to come
Q:  Why is Shiv  Sena’s symbol ‘Bow and Arrow’?
A: I can tell you, but  then I’ll have to shoot you